Peace of My Heart

An encouraging voice to drown out the noise

~Love Yourself~ July 15, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — Valerie Rutledge @ 10:06 am
Tags: , , , , , , ,

For those of you who read my blog on a regular basis, you may have noticed my posts have been a bit sporadic over the last couple of weeks. This may come as a surprise to you, but every once in a while, I get discouraged. Shocker, right?!

Ok, so I’m messing with you, of course I get discouraged, we all do! Last week was particular frustrating for me. Nothing life shattering happened, I was just irritated. So much so that during Wednesday night Bible study, I essentially tuned Pastor out and sat in the back journaling my frustrations, (sorry Pastor, it wasn’t you, it was me).

I wrote about my lack of motivation to write. Ironic? Yes. I have a desire to one day publish and yet feel completely inadequate to reach that goal. My writing is too plain & there are far too many authors better equipped than I so who would want to pay to read my material?

My voice lesson didn’t go so hot either and that had my questioning if I should be involved in music ministry. Singing just doesn’t come naturally to me, I have to work at it, so maybe that means I should quit. In all honesty, my team doesn’t need me, right?

Times like this are incredibly difficult for me to overcome. I become my own worst critic & believe me, I am relentless with the harsh things I speak to myself. But then God gave me a little aha moment in the midst of my ramblings.

Recently I have caught my oldest daughter being rather hateful to her younger sisters more often than just typical spats that siblings are bound to have. When I called her out on it, I asked “Would you treat anyone outside of this house like that?!” Of course she responded with a resounding “No.” I followed up with, “Then why are you so quick to cut down the very people you should treat the best?!”

God has this way of taking the words I speak as a parent and making me turn them around on myself. I’m not always crazy about His methods, but He knows how to get my attention!

I would never look at another woman and call her a terrible mother.

I would never lock eyes with a friend struggling in their ministry and tell them their struggles were evidence that clearly they had missed their calling & it’s time to call it quits.

I would never belittle how someone chose to express their creativity.

And yet, these are all things I have screamed at myself. I am careful to choose kind and gentle words with others but berate myself every chance I get. Perhaps I should take my own advice given to my daughter, “If you wouldn’t talk to a complete stranger with such harshness than don’t speak it over someone you love.”

Yes, we should love ourselves. Even in our shortcomings, our struggles and our epic failures, we should show ourselves the same love and grace we extend to others. If like me, you tend to be gentler with others than yourself, try putting a different spin on a well known Scripture, love yourself as you love your neighbor.affe8253f3defec8b2654eefb29c8e31


6 Responses to “~Love Yourself~”

  1. Steve Rebus Says:

    Valerie, so sorry to hear you’re feeling discouraged at the moment. I love your writing and being able to follow a loving sister along your journey really inspires me. So as a loving brother i hope this soon passes and we’ll be seeing a lot more of you! Take care x 🙂

    • Thanks so much, Steve! As always, your words are an encouragement to my weary soul. So very thankful that I’ve connected with fellow believers through this blog. You are a true blessing to me!

  2. James Says:

    For the record, I happen to know that your vocal instructor thought your lesson went well! Value is not found in the struggle, but in the change produced by the tenacity to fight until…

    You have a beautiful voice, and – though I have a feeling you’ve already worked through this – your team NEEDS you. Though you have a great gift in your voice, your value to the worship team goes so much deeper than what could ever be heard in a vocal mix. Your impact – along with all the others on the team – is felt at a greater volume than sound waves can carry or ears can perceive.

    Having said all of that, I also want to thank you for being so candid. It is the reason God has you writing, and it is the reason that – even with all of the multitude of authors out there – you are a needed voice in writings of the Kingdom.

    • Thank you, James. I have worked through it, again! It is a struggle I’ve dealt with before but the recovery time has a quicker turnaround than it used to! I appreciate your words of wisdom & encouragement and I am very thankful for your leadership. We have something unique & special in our worship team and you & Heather are such a blessing to the group.

  3. bunnyb1802 Says:

    So cool to find your website after you paid a visit to my blog. this is the first post i read and it was like you had been spying on me (I mean that in a good, non freaky way). I mean the thoughts about writing and hoping to be published but wow, the discouragement and the same thoughts.!

    I really appreciated reading this. Sometimes, God will pull us up with something that comes out of our own mouths and this was brilliant that God did this to you (although I get the not being always crazy about this method!).

    I find it so hard to extend the same love and mercy to myself as I do to others and hubs (who isn’t a Christian) says often that if I don’t love myself, how do I know how to love others – a line from a Madonna song!

    Great post Valerie and I look forward to reading much more. Love the style of writing. Be encouraged, I think you have something unique to say to the world… your own story! keep writing, keep singing.

    • Thanks so much for taking the time time to share with me. I have thoroughly enjoyed making connections with other writers through this blog. It’s such a blessing to find encouragement and be an encouragement at the same time!

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