Many times over the years I’ve had people ask me what I do for a living. More often than not, my response has been, “I’m just a mom.” It never really occurred to me that I almost sounded apologetic about my decision to be a stay at home mom until my daughter completed an assignment that included the age old question, what do you want to be when you grow up? She simply wrote, a mom.
Not “just” a mom, but a mom. I was suddenly very aware that my choice of words implied that being a mom was somehow subpar to every other occupation.
One of the many definitions of the word just states “no more than.” So all these years, I’ve essentially been saying, “I’m no more than a mom,” as if I’m: 1-embarrassed by that or 2-have no identity outside of that. Neither of which are true.
I love being a stay at home mom. Even this morning my own mother and I were discussing having no regrets over the amount of time we’ve spent with our children. My mom stayed home with us, too, and reassures me often that I’ll be thankful I did when my children are grown. When I talk with working mothers, I don’t feel ashamed that I don’t help “bring home the bacon,” so why would I imply with my words that I am?
There have been seasons when I felt like ALL I was revolved around being a mom, especially in the wee baby stages when I was the food source and therefor at the beck and call of my little tapeworms. However, I know that I have more to offer this world outside of my mothering abilities.
As I’ve thought about what message I’ve unintentionally conveyed, I’m reminded of the importance of filtering our words. Countless times I’ve heard our Pastor say that every word matters when he’s hashing out a verse of Scripture, the same is true of the words we speak. It’s amazing to me how one four letter word can change the tone of your message:
I am a mom.
I am just a mom.
Do you see it?!
I am flattered that my daughter wants to be a mom when she grows up. That one statement revealed to me that my girl looks at what I do as something to strive towards, not some overlooked, unappreciated title. And while I am a mom, I am so much more and so are all of my other mom friends, those who work outside the home & those who don’t. Ladies, (and fellas too), you are not just any one thing. You are a beautifully complex individual, completely unique and vitally important…yeah, you rock!
“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.”
(Psalm 139: 14 NLT)