It was 6:45 on Tuesday morning and I was attempting to get a little Jesus time. Problem was, I have two little girls who were dead set on interrupting my quiet time. Just when I thought I’d found my happy place, one of the intruders burst into a string of demands.
So, with my Unglued book in hand, how do you suppose I handled this invasion of mommy time?
“Will you ever stop?!” I snipped at my chubby cheek girl. Her response…she giggled.
And so did I.
You see, I had just that very moment sat reading about raw emotions and not allowing uncontrollable circumstances to dictate my reactions and I failed, epic fail as my children would say. So I had a choice to make, I could let this slip up ruin the remainder of the day or I could show myself a little grace and move on with my life.
On this particular day, I chose grace. I pushed aside my study materials, scooped Bella up and went to the kitchen to fix her a snack, a cup of juice and fired up her favorite movie. I didn’t get to finish all that I wanted to accomplish in my bible study guide but I did get the opportunity to apply what we are studying about. I like to think of it as life application.
I am so incredibly guilty of allowing unexpected interruptions to define how my day will go. I am aware that this bit of information shows just how much of an OCD control freak I can be, and I am ok with that BECAUSE admitting that is a step in the right direction. Learning to adjust my reactions when things don’t go just as I imagined is a process.
Thankfully I am not going through it alone.
“So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you.
He will neither fail you nor abandon you.”
(Deuteronomy 31:6 NLT)
I’m not about to say that I won’t ever have a meltdown again over some random, uncontrollable glitch in my day. I am human. I will make mistakes. But by God’s grace I will move forward, not backwards. I will press on towards my goal of being a calmer, more easy-going version of myself. I will learn to accept that I am not master of the universe and the fate of the world does not rest squarely on my shoulders.